Don't you just find it difficult to live the words you say? the things that you believe? and the things you learned? ...because I do. Well, in some cases I am effective, or make that able to mean what I say. And in some, it's just hard specially when your feelings are involved...Well it isn't about promises, because I seldom make one... and when I do, I stay true to my word.
Right now, I just realized that I shouldn't expect much (again)...
I know Dr. Scott Peck, that pains and problems should be faced, should be experienced... but since it's not happening yet, I should just make my move on how to avoid being hurt again. 'Coz maybe the next time around, I wouldn't be able to take it like what I have chose to do like the day when I "decided".
I'm afraid.
You might wonder what these things have to do with living your word...
I said a couple of times to my friend already that I'm going to do something about my situation. Something that I think is the best action to take, but I failed... I could take the things that are "happening" somehow, but I don't know how long I can hold myself right... Plus, I'm being or making myself vulnerable here; I can't seem to move on from what I used to have, to do, I can't say no.
*sigh*
It is important to mean what you say and to live what you believe, because if you don't, then who are you really? Where's your sense of self? Your sense of compassion for improvement and life? Isn't it pretention that you know this is right and this is wrong but you can't even apply what you should?
We all are guilty of this somehow, and we can't be perfect; but at least do your best and do what you mean.
I know most of my posts have been really sad lately... and I have a tendency to blog a lot about sad things. These things are really happening and bothering me, and most of the time I don't want to talk about it with friends or with people, because I'm somehow giving some kind of burden to them too (even now, to you)...
I talk joyfully at school, with friends, with strangers... but I know something is wrong with me. So to those people who read my entries, I ask for your patience and apology. I'm really not in the mood for happy entries and I am not capable of sharing any as of this moment... But like I always say, this will pass...
6 gave me a comment:
I can relate and yet somehow I can't, I thought I understand yet somehow I'm lost.
"we know what is wrong and what is right"
but when we have to choose, sometimes it's not really easy...
I don't know if I'm getting your point with this comment, but maybe I have some sort of an idea. Just like you said, it will pass... and when it does, we come out a better person ;)
Roy : thanks so much for dropping by Roy. ^__^
Hehe... Actually, I eliminated some stuffs on my entry. Didn't want to share things in details. :D Sorry if it came out confusing. But your comment hit my point.
Have a nice day... and thanks again. :)
you can post anything you want sis, we are not to blog just to please anyone right? its always for our pleasure and through the sadness or happiness or whatever feeling is involved on a post, I know that in some ways we can find something to learn from it naman diba..
you are so correct on not to expect much.. kaya nga ako pag may nangutang sakin di ko na expect na babayaran ako ahehehehe.. smile sis and the world will smile back to you ;)
joanjoyce thanks sis :) and I'll take note on those last words that you said. ^__^
You don't have to apologise for being a bit sad. It makes sense. But really, I think at our age we can't always live by what we say because we are learning so much, and our views are always changing. That's part of life and trying to be a better person, it takes time so it can be hard on the way. That's how I feel anyway. Sometimes I feel sure, sometimes I'm not sure at all and change my mind about everything.
mspennylane Hi penny. nice to see you back :) Thanks for spending some of your time here... I've read that you've been busy these days... Hope you're okay.
You are right... and since we are still young we are still building ourselves. I just want to be better than I used to be. :)
I change my mind often too. Specially when it comes to feelings.
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Have a nice day! ^______^